Corporate Motherhood (with SEN)

Corporate Motherhood (with SEN)

Stepping from a Professional Job into Motherhood and then chucking in some SEN....... (Special Education Needs if you're not familiar with the latest acronym!)

BAU used to be daily defined work related tasks that didn't test your sanity, cleanliness or patience. Now it is school runs, packed lunches, homework, school paperwork, unfathomable sibling arguments, terrible sleep, hospital appointments, speech therapy, play therapy, occupational therapy, physical therapy, anyothertherapy, and lots of poo.

KSOR used to be the 'must do' business basics to keep things ticking over. These may have been repetitious but again generally never challenged your sanity, cleanliness or patience. Now KSOR is emptying and reloading the dishwasher at least 3 times per day, wiping lick marks off of all windows, TV screens and glass, clearing up small piles of reflux vomit that I stumble across on the floor, picking up numerous random objects from the floor (usually shiny things - cheese graters, sieves, pan lids etc), oh and lots and lots and lots and lots of clothes washing, drying and putting away. And - not to be forgotten - lots and lots of Caffeine for Mum!!!!!

Reports: I still deal with facts and figures - oh yes - plenty...... but now it is 'how many times do you have to hand a spoon back to your child at meal-times in a 24 hour period?' (really!), 'how many meters can your child walk without feeling discomfort?', 'How many words or signs does your child have?', 'how many times per night do you need to re-settle your child in bed?', 'how many times do you wipe their nose?', 'Is your child continent?' and so on and so on - generally lots of reports on things your child can't do and what help they need. So uplifting, huh?!

Negotiations: These used to result in business or personal benefit. Now? They involve whose turn is it on the iPad, how many chocolate biscuits are acceptable, how many more minutes before bedtime, what club you'll take away if the bedroom isn't tidied and so on. These negotiators are far more wearing than those of the boardroom, & typically I feel less successful (for the adult!).

And Business Development?? Well - researching therapies, convincing your GP & paediatrician of said new therapies, laminating stuff, visual time-tables, play-dates, introducing new things on trial and error basis (diet, therapy, supplements etc) & some more laminating just for the fun of it.

Would I change it? No - well - maybe a little! Heres to Corporate Motherhood with a splash (or rather big fat dollop) of SEN.

I do sometimes wonder how I used to fill my days......?

So do we buy a puppy?

I grew up with dogs, and never thought for a minute that I would be 'dogless' once I had children. But, then I actually had children & couldn't understand for a second how you could possibly need another commitment, needy, poo machine! But then this happened

We have just spent a lovely weekend with family and their new puppy. What I was surprised to see, was the connection our Little I and this puppy had (now wishing I had taken a picture of them together!). They hung out. Puppy would follow Little I around , Little I would smile at him and pat him, and then every now and then, she would launch herself at him for a super big hug. They shared toys (I gave up on hygiene years ago), they shared licks (gross), & they shared some kind of a connection.

Little I was very calm all weekend, despite a reasonably unfamiliar environment & lots of people. She was smiley, content and sociable. Was this the puppy love working yet more magic?

So what's the science? Why the connection? I can see my next line of research forming......

Hmmmm.......... what to do.........

I already have 3 children that I have unsuccessfully trained (so no evidence to suggest I could train a dog), and I already have more poo in my life than anyone should have to experience. I'm also already torn in far too many directions, oh and dogs cost money (lots!) ....... but.... but.... but.....

Love each other x

A Yes Day is like warm chicken soup

Warm chicken soup is good for the sole, so they say. Well a "Yes day" is to your mental health, what chicken soup is for your sole.

Last Sunday I took my eldest out for a day in London - (big thank you to her wonderful auntie [my super sister] who arranged it). It was a day when I got to say 'yes' to my big girl all day long, and we were both buzzing  by the end of it (possibly from all the cakes eaten at afternoon tea, but I think more from all the positivity that day).

There were no exploding nappies, no vomits, no buggy versus stairs, no "can we find a suitable toilet?", no negotiations, no sibling arguments, no trying to please everyone, but.....

There were lots of
"yes, let's do it",
holding hands,
proper listening (not the half ear job I manage normally whilst chasing around after her siblings),
proper meal time conversations (not interrupted by the usual shrieking, plate throwing, toilet trips, food/floor recovery, endless menu conversations re sugar/gluten/dairy free foods and so on),
and lots & lots of FUN!!!!!

It's not to say that we don't have fun when we go out as a family - it's just it's very manic, I don't really focus on the fun - more the logistics, and eldest bean gets the least amount of attention - because her younger siblings beat her on age and disability. Top trumps.

I can't really put into words how good that day made me feel, and what a boost that has been. My daughter hasn't stopped talking about it either and is already looking forward to our next venture out - Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - again a massive thank you to my booking agent (best auntie/sister EVER!!!!).

Book yourself some 'us time' with your other child/ren - and if you have a super helpful friend or relative that's reading this - perhaps they'll arrange it for you - otherwise (if you're like me), these things just linger an epic 'to do' list.

Love each other x